I’ve sat down to write a few times in the past days and I even have a draft or two of unfinished words to show for it. But that’s all. My thoughts are incomplete lately. Add to that my lack of time, and I don’t have much to post around here. But I have been reading a lot these days. A great parenting book that is helping my perspective with a challenging toddler. And a number of great blog entries that speak to me lately. Like this one. And this one. And this one.
Sometimes I wonder why I write here and what I am doing. I have 29 months of my life documented on this site. I just know I love the community that happens when you read something that seems like it’s written for you. A teacher friend of mine kept a particular C.S. Lewis quote hanging in her classroom every year so that her students were reminded that “We read to know that we are not alone.” It’s true always, whether it’s great works of literature that stand the test of time or rambling from fellow moms who post thoughts in their little corners of the internet.
The truth is that motherhood was not all that hard for me until recently. Or I think I thought it was maybe, but it wasn’t. It’s not just the jump from one to two; it’s the ages and stages we are in right now. I know this too shall pass. I know that. But for right now, I am just holding on for small doses of peace in my day and tiny victories. A poop in the potty today. Yay! A cozy moment before bed. Yay! Some fun imaginary play in the bathtub. Yay! A morning of quiet with a cooing baby and hot coffee. Yay!
It’s the little things.
And it’s Labor Day weekend which is always a reminder that life is moving forward and the seasons are soon changing, and new things are headed my way. I let my freak flag fly again today just like I’ve explained before and encouraged Jude to play with livestock. His smile is well worth the risk of chicken poop.
It’s the little things that make him happy, too. Why am I always forgetting that about myself and about him and about all of us?