24 weeks

I think I need to get my head in the game here.  In roughly 4 months, I’ll have another baby living at my house.  My baby.  Needing a lot of attention and diapers and clothes and boobs and all of the things that newborns are so good at demanding. I might be the only one, or maybe this is the way it is for everyone, but I find that this pregnancy is going so fast that I cannot keep up.  I thought it felt weird  to flip the calendar to second trimester, and in a few weeks, I will welcome the third one. WHAT IS HAPPENING?  Time is this weird concept that is not realistically evolving for me lately.  Today I turn 24 weeks, and last night, we took this photo.

24 weeks

Isn’t he a good helper? Jude is getting used to the idea of a baby around, and he talks about her independently without my asking or urging which is so fun.  Still though, I feel like there is a lot to do.  I got together with some friends over the weekend, and we only see each other every few months, so I received a couple of little gifts for Norah.  There are tiny pink things!  And monogrammed things!  In my house!  And where to put them, I don’t know.

I know we have time to get the nursery done, but I also want it finished before I am in my last month because I am a control freak and want to help out with all of it and get things set up on my own before I am too large or incapacitated to do it all. This means I have something like 12 or so weeks to get it done which is tons of time until I think about the mountains of things that reside in the closet of the guest bedroom that will soon be a nursery.  And the furniture in there.  And the white walls that will leave soon.  And the furniture we need to purchase.  And everything else there is to do.  I thought nesting didn’t start until late in the game, but my cleaning and purging urges are out of control lately.  At 7:58am this past Monday, I was cleaning out my freezer and pantry.

And then there is the realization that this baby does have to come out.  Preferably from my vagina.  And I am 100% certain in my convictions, but old fears from the last round are creeping up this week, and it’s scary.

[Side note: it might be my faulty memory, but I am fairly sure at this point in my first pregnancy I was in prenatal yoga and reading lots of parenting books and looking at a crib that already stood assembled in my house and feeling serene and confident in my ability to birth and completely ready for a new arrival.  My, how time changes things.]

This post seems worthless and sort of a rant, but it feels good to write things down, no?  Now off to get busy.  I’ve got some cleaning to do.

One thought on “24 weeks

  1. It’s really interesting for me to read about your 2nd pregnancy as I doubt I’ll have one (somehow I think Greyson will be it for me), but it puts me in a state of mind to think of how I would feel and what I would do differently if I did head down this road.

    I hope things go smoothly for you from the nursery to the birth. Wishing you peace, my dear!

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